Church art makes me fart.

 I read that our government is not keen on having much art and music taught in schools - they want kids to learn maths, science and English. I'm all with the language thing and reckon that old people who can't use grammar properly should be sent back to school. 

Art? Well, a lot of art in Catholic churches is misleading people. Get rid of it, I say. Get rid of the bloody churches too. They could be converted into accommodation for homeless people. Look at this picture...

 Whoops, I know, that's Angry Jesus. Here's a better one...

Does that look like someone from the Middle East? Looks more like an English woman with a beard. I didn't know that Jesus wore eye makeup.

COME ON! WAKE UP!

These churches are full of shit! I'm with the government. Get rid of bloody art. Music can be annoying too. Like when you're trying to sleep. Those Hims (I spelt that differently because everything in church seems to be decided by men) they sing are puerile. Sucking up to some god who is not listening. Example: The All Blacks lost last night. God didn't give a shit.

That's it from me this morning. I need to get to Mass.

YEAH, RIGHT!

I'm not dreaming of a blue Christmas, that's for damn sure!

Okay, so a blue guy shows up, with a new blog, and starts writing all this fancy, mysterious shit.

Blogger: The Blue Man

My advice?
STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THIS BLOG!

It looks like arty farty shit.

I'd tell this blue guy to take his blue Christmas balls and stick them up his blue arse.

This...

...up here!

Art sucks!

Right now I'm busy with important things, like getting food and drink sorted.
Artists bludge food and drink because most are starving as their pieces of shit art sit in galleries at inflated prices.

WTF is this?

Okay, let me help you artists...
GET A DAY JOB!

Also, don't write big blurbs about your paintings. 

We don't care what you were trying to do.

If it looks like shit, it is shit.

Maybe try harder next time.

I'll be honest, it's a silly name!

I'm talking about The 6 Strings - the new branding for our group of blogs.

The whole bloody guitar thing has gone on for two long. I'd rather we were called The Trumpet Section or, more appropriately, The Bass Section. But there you go, we're the bloody 6 strings.
More bloody twangy guitars!
Oh well, never mind, at least we're bloggers and not potters or weavers.

How did pottery become art?

Look at these three pictures - this is a bit of a quiz.

Okay, you could say they're pretty but which one of these answers best describes what they are?
a) High art
b) Containers for food and drink
c) Items from an art gallery
d) Art worth big bucks
e) None of these

Don't forget, before you try to be smart, that only an idiot answer 'e)None of these'.

The correct answer is 'b) Containers for food and drink'.

Take my word for it - they don't look so fancy when the plate (or bowl) is full of spaghetti (with cheese dripping everywhere) and the cup is filled with coffee.
At best these things are fancy cups and saucers, things that hold your food and drink. Okay, they might have been a bit trendy in the 1970s but those days, and the bloody hippies, are long gone.
Want a plate? Go to The Warehouse - they're only $3.

$3 and good for holding spaghetti.

I don't want to sound happy all the time, but...

...getting around Bass Bagging Hexagram blogs has never been easier!

I just use this...

I'm talking about the LINKS on the right - all the blogs I need to reach!

Now this is what I call art!

I moan a lot about art and artists on this blog.

Finally I have found something that represents perfection!

THE BASS BAGGING HEXAGRAM.

Perfect symmetry and probably the best avatar anyone has ever come up with!