Music is more fun when you make stuff up.

Fancy being a so called Classical musician and spending your life playing other people's music.

I guess that, if you choose to play an instrument like the oboe, it's your own damn fault.
While I'm on the topic, why would anyone want to become a tympanist?

Imagine that you're at a party and the old guitar comes out and a sing along develops. 

Someone calls out, "Brian, go get your tympany!"

Straight away there are a few problems here:

• What are the odds of your tympany being in the back of your car?
• Do you really want to lug them into a party situation where someone is bound to put his bottle of beer on one of your drums?
• Tympany are not going to work on Brown Eyed Girl.
• Someone is probably going to tell you to shut up.
• Anyway, let's be honest, no one is going to call out, "Brian, go get your tympany!"

Here's another scenario. You turn up at a jam - you have your viola and you're all dressed up in your penguin suit - but then you realise there is no music! You're going to have to make it up.

Tough shit fella!

I hear Classical musicians moaning that the audience for Classical concerts is dying off and some orchestras are struggling. Well, this is a sign from Angry Jesus that these musicians should start playing different stuff. Shorter pieces that don't go on for bloody hours.